The Ultimate Guide, III
Posted by Ray @ 2:06 pm
Ever had this happen to you before?
I thought so.
Shhh. We’ll keep it a secret, you & me. Okay?
In other news, a South African woman has invented a device that “clamps itself to a rapist’s penis forcing him to seek medical treatment and be revealed to the police”. Because we all know that many young, virgin women would have no problems at all stuffing a device large enough to engulf an erect African man’s penis, into their vaginas.
Play WOW, get smacked by Big Brother
Posted by Ray @ 8:16 amChina plans to limit the number of hours gamers can play MMORPGs online. According to a Register article:
[A]nyone who goes over a three-hour limit will see his character’s abilities reduced. Hitting five hours will result in severe character limitation. Players will then have to take a five-hour break before getting back down to it.
The games affected? World of Warcraft & Lineage II, amongst others.
Now parents have the ultimate in computer-game-time control:
“If you don’t stop playing computer games and do your homework, gahmen will reduce your WOW character’s stats!”
*Shudders*
A few updates
Posted by Ray @ 10:02 pmWired magazine has a cute little interview with Jon Stewart (he of The Daily Show fame).
Now, I get most of my Daily Show fix from downloading it… so I was quite tickled when the interviewer mentioned shutting down trading of the show, and Stewart said:
“We’re not going to shut it down - we don’t even know what it is. I’m having enough trouble just getting porn.”
That’s nice to know. It’s like the Dave Matthews Band telling their fans how to circumvent the copy-protection on their latest CD (for all you windoze users only, bwahaha!). Though as mr brown mentions, it’s probably illegal in Singapore regardless.
Speaking of interviews, there’s one with Adam Savage (he of Mythbusters fame) which is just… an interview. I only mention it because nobody I know watches Mythbusters, which is an utter shame, because it’s an awesome show. Go and watch it, all of you!
And finally, here’s one of those pieces of news that’s a goldmine of satire. Thailand’s PM wants to know which one of his Ministers had penis enlargement surgery. Apparently, the Minister in question could testify and help the case of a woman whose face was disfigured by the same doctor. Said the woman:
“The problem of my face is bigger than the problem of your penis.”
At which point, the Minister probably thought to himself: “Yes, but the dimensions of my penis is bigger than the dimensions of your face.”
Zing!
(Heh. I’m sorry. There were so many places I could’ve taken that, and I chose… the penis joke. What can I say?)
The Freud Strikes Back
Posted by Ray @ 8:12 pm
Just another example of foot-in-mouth disease (thank you, Russ). Yes, I do say things like this in front of company.
I wonder what will happen should I slip up in Court…
Dance till the music fades.
Posted by Zeng @ 11:33 pm
Busy busy.
Hows everyone doing?
Feels like a down period for a lot of ppl out there or isit just my circle of friends?
comments comments?
The agony
Posted by Zeng @ 12:50 am
What the-
Posted by Ray @ 10:51 pmSo my room-mate informs me that Singtel is giving away iBooks to subscribers of their broadband plan.
I currently pay $56/mo for PacNet’s 512K ADSL connection.
Singtel’s plan costs $88/mo.
For an extra $22/mo, and a minimum subscription period of 3 years (which amounts to an extra $792), you get:
- An iBook.
- A downstream connection rate of 10Mbps - 20x my current connection!
- A bloody iBook damnit
And I’m here, in Australia, unable to enjoy the fruits of a good promotion.
Gah!
Edit:
A friend has informed me that there are, and I quote, “…no more iBooks, miss.” Apparently this promotion was a popular one, because according to her the salesgirl said that even before she asked about it.
Bummer.
Oh, democracy
Posted by Ray @ 12:08 amSo there’s rumblings of an upcoming Presidential Election in Singapore. Asked around a bit, and just happened to have this MSN conversation with someone (mildly edited):
[Name Withheld]: I wanna vote!
[Ray]: Why?
[Name Withheld]: ‘cos I realised I’m 21, and I can vote
So… her reasoning for wanting to vote boiled down to: “Hey, I just turned 21, let’s try out this new voting thing I can do now.” Heh. And maybe she can catch an R-21 movie, too?
But on the flip side… at least she can be bothered to vote. So I’ll take this as a positive thing rather than the vacuous prattling of the stereotypical apathetic but bored Singapore Citizen.
[Name Withheld]: [actually.. i forgot i was 21 and cld vote.. until [name withheld] reminded me.. it took me a while to realise i can vote.. hahha]
Then again, maybe not.
Ooh, baby do you know what that’s worth?
Posted by Ray @ 10:54 pmOoh, heaven is a place on earth.
I have discovered that my room-mate’s computer has a bunch of gorgeous, old music. I’m now grooving to Belinda Carlisle and Boy meets Girl (amongst others). Of course, “old” is a relative term… this is music I grew up to, late-80s stuff.
Trying to catch your heart
Is like trying to catch a star
Listening in, something struck me: a lot of these artistes were one-trick-ponies. It seems to have been a rare occurrence when an artiste managed to get more than 1 hit song out. Take Wilson Phillips‘ Hold On:
Some day somebody’s gonna make you want to
Turn around and say goodbye
I’ll bet all of you know that song! Yet I’d also bet that you’d be hard-pressed to name me any other song the group made. Which means all that hard effort gone into creating other songs, all the time they spent in the recording studio, or in their rooms with lyric sheets, or talking with producers and instrumentalists, or rehearsing, or marketting… all that work was effectively for one song.
…
Just a thought.
Somewhere in my heart I’m always
Dancing with you in the summer rain~
Oh, boo hoo
Posted by Ray @ 11:25 am
Men interacting with this strange sub-genus of human females should always follow the 3Gs: Get in, Get some, and Get out.
Of course, then we’d be perpetuating the circle of life. But hey, all is as mother nature intended. It’s all good, no? ^_^
Oh, and happy national day. We forgot about it down under!
Housekeeping crap follows…
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